The rules of dating my daughter...

"Mom, what are the rules of dating?"
"Huh?"
"I mean, I know I have to be 16, but what else?"
"Well, we have to meet him, like him and trust that he will bring you home on time and treat you well."

So, okay, 1 out of 5 is good...

Being 16, and understanding our rules for dating, we thought maybe, just maybe, we'd gotten through to Elizabeth.

She planned it all out carefully. She would attend her "flag and color guard" practice on Thursday night and have her "friend" pick her up at 8:45 from there, go out to a local Starbucks and be home around 10. Innocent enough. However, there's a couple of things she forgot about.

1) Tell your parents your plans.

2) Don't have your friends cover for you, because your mom is smarter than that.

3) Answer your cell phone.

4) Don't think you can sneak in at 12:30, hoping your parents forgot you were out and would thus be asleep.

5) Come up with some better lies.

One such Thursday went just like that.

When Liz didn't return from her flag practice we knew she'd gone out with some friends (read 'boyfriend') afterwards. But when it began getting late, I called some of her friends, getting conflicting answers. Then I texted her, "YOU HAVE 5 MINUTES TO GET HOME." That was followed by another text, "GET HOME NOW!!!"

Why she didn't take me seriously, I'll never know. Okay, I really do. It's called a 'boyfriend.'

When 12:00 approached (and this is a school night, mind you) and Liz wasn't home, I was a nervous wreck and had Rick call the police. Frisco has a curfew for kids her age. 12:00. And either they would help us find the person who abducted her or they would pick her up for breaking the law. Either reason was fine.

When Liz tried sneaking in at 12:30 AM, she saw us on the phone with the police, giving them the names of all of her friends. Especially the name of the boy we had not yet met.

"But Mom! I couldn't come home! I tried. There were guys all over the front lawn and I was scared and I didn't want to walk past them!"

"Huh? There weren't any guys on the lawn when I was out there twenty-seven times looking for you."

"I mean't the side yard. Yeah, they were hanging out on the side of our house."

"Yeah, nice try, but if there were any guys on the side of our house, uh, you could have come in the front door then... Besides, the dog didn't even bat an eye, let alone bark."

- pause -

"And could you NOT have called us? To let us know about all of these strangers hanging out on our lawn that perhaps I should have known about?"

"Phone was dead."

"Then how come it's ringing now?"

"IT'S A MIRACLE!"