Saturday, August 2, 2014

it's been a good day ... today

I define success as having succeeded at doing what one set out to do.  I used to define success as being rich and famous, two things I'm not.  Neither rich nor famous.  And yet, I've already had my fifteen minutes of fame.  Twice.  So, uh, that makes me successful?  Yeah, no.

So what were my fifteen minutes of fame?  More about that later.  Maybe.  It really isn't all that interesting.  But I was successful today at a couple of things.

So far today I've driven to the bank.  Check.  Worked out an overdraft charge that I thought wasn't correct.  Check.  It was correct, sadly.  Check.

I prepared and drank a cup of coffee.  Check.
I played umpteen games of Freecell and Mahjong.  Okay.  Check.

Is this better?  I got dressed.  Check.

But in all seriousness, I did drive a friend to WalMart to pick up an ottoman that she ordered that she couldn't get home in her small car.  It did fit in my SUV.  We drove back to her house and assembled it.  Check, check, check?  No.  Not really.  I don't count that as success.  What I count it as, is compassion.  Cindy lost her husband, her absolute best friend just three short months ago and I haven't been there very much for her.  I had planned to but I looked around and saw a lot of people helping her.  She didn't need me.  WRONG.  Oh how wrong I was.

About a week ago she put out an SOS on Facebook asking for help getting this ottoman home.  I knew I had an SUV, I knew I have always enjoyed Cindy's company (not that that mattered) and I knew I liked to help people when I could.  I knew I wanted to do this.  And I did.  Still not going to count this as a success, though.  Because it was just darn fun.

It was awesome to see Cindy laugh and to see Cindy smile as we tried to get this huge thing into her house and then get it assembled.  Cindy thanked me and then chatted with me about all that's gone on in her life over the past three months.  I'm a dope and haven't been around and thus didn't know.  Cindy has a new job and some new friends and is taking care of all of her house projects pretty well.  CINDY is SUCCESSFUL.  Kris is just learning a little bit of compassion.  Kris was void of it for awhile.

So, what's the moral of the story here?  Not sure, other than, I saw SUCCESS in action last night.  When one has to succeed at something, you can.  Me?  Just getting dressed and driving to the bank?  Not so successful, unless that's all the will power I had and all I had to live for.  And that's not correct.  So, uh, I'm not very successful.  Cindy, on the other hand, exemplifies success.  She struggled so deeply with her husband's death that she doesn't even remember the days following the death.  And everyone worried about her.  She has come so far.  She has truly been successful at overcoming the pain and the grief (and yes, I know it's still an ongoing process) and moving forward as her husband would've wanted.

Cindy also had some parting words for me last night.  I've heard these words before, we all have, but I truly heard them for the first time last night.  Cindy simply said, "Treasure your husband.  Love him.  He won't be there one day."  And she's so right.  And I plan to be successful at being a wife from now on.

Not a rich one, not a famous one.  Been there, done that in fact.  (Yeah, yeah, details later.)

I will continue to get dressed each day.  I'll go to the bank and argue my case, when necessary, but the very most important thing I can be successful at (and believe me, I have a LONG way to go) is to be a good wife to Rick.

Ready, set, go!    And don't tell Rick that I'm on a new journey.  I'd like to surprise him myself.



No comments: