Saturday, May 9, 2015

dna ... do not abbreviate ... dogs need amor ... dirty noble aristocats ...

Um, I have no idea what DNA stands for but I have now been swabbed and my DNA has been sent off to wherever it needed to go.  At least I hope it was mine.

I arrived at the genetic testing site and waited ... and waited ... for all of the technicians to get off of their cell phones.  Once they did, one young lady took me back to a little room where, most likely, blood is regularly taken out of folks.  The gal handed me a urine cup and said she needed a specimen.  I mentioned that I was not told about this but she said it was needed.  She then pointed to a little chair and asked me to sit so that she could take my blood.

"Blood?" I asked.

"Yes, that's necessary."

"But I was only told you'd be taking a swab of my mouth," I said.

The technician looked at me like I was crazy.  I was about to question her some more when she said, "Aren't you Regina Ray?"

Um ... no?   And I just knew this wasn't going to go well.

So, she got herself straightened out and the right side of my mouth was swabbed.  Then the left side.  Then the swabs were placed back into the envelope that she'd taken them out of.  Then she placed the envelope into a plastic baggie with some code numbers.  Then she stepped out of the room to go get a FedEx envelope.  She was gone long enough that I could've messed with those two swabs a whole bunch.  But I didn't.

The technician arrived back with that FedEx envelope and made me watch as she placed my swabs into it and then sealed it.  She proudly held it up when she was done.  I noticed that it said nothing on the front and was addressed to no one.  I was sure hoping she'd remember what was inside when she tottered off to make another cell phone call.  I also hoped she'd mail it off to the right place.  I just had my doubts, I did.

I decided to ask her one last question before I left ... just to see what her answer would be.  How long would it take?  I mean, I knew the answer but I wanted to hear her's.

"It take two days to get there.  So, if it arrives on Monday or Tuesday, you should have your answer the next day."

Yeah, no.  This was a 3 week test with results not being known to us for a full 14 business days.  Like I said, I just wanted to hear her answer.  Regina did, too.

So, maybe my sample has gone off to the lab and maybe it hasn't.  Maybe Regina's has and maybe it hasn't, either.

Maybe we'll learn something from all of this.

And maybe we won't.

And maybe Regina will get that call that she's been waiting for.  It could happen, you know.


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